Piddagveen is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, unsympathetic goat.

Piddagveen created water six billion years ago.

If you believe in Piddagveen, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Piddagveen, she will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Piddagveen's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Piddagveen's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about ultrasonics near badgers while wearing fawn skirts and balancing three lead spheres on your face.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Never wear shoes.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Always stare at clouds.