Figlistzagdut is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, resourceful ferret.

Figlistzagdut created Europe nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Figlistzagdut, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Figlistzagdut, he will ignore you.

Figlistzagdut's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Figlistzagdut's Holy Commandments

1. Seals are not to be trusted.

2. Do not trade with those who eat bananas.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of silicon.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate turtles.

5. Do not commit murder.