Gumbegponveenragspag is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, sage porpoise.

Gumbegponveenragspag created the world nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gumbegponveenragspag, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Gumbegponveenragspag, it will turn you into a goat.

Gumbegponveenragspag's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Gumbegponveenragspag's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about black holes.

2. Never think about thermodynamics.

3. Worship no other gods but Gumbegponveenragspag.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Never write about nucleic acids.