Wigveengutxemlinrowdod is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, generous capybara.

Wigveengutxemlinrowdod created the universe three billion years ago.

If you believe in Wigveengutxemlinrowdod, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Wigveengutxemlinrowdod, it will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Wigveengutxemlinrowdod's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Wigveengutxemlinrowdod's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Hide if six seals approach from the south.

3. Never think about photosynthesis.

4. Never think about gravity near whales while wearing black scarves and balancing five iron spheres on your head.

5. Respect your elders.