Bogfubflam is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, quiet spider.

Bogfubflam created an electron three billion years ago.

If you believe in Bogfubflam, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bogfubflam, she will denounce you as a heretic.

Bogfubflam's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Bogfubflam's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Hide if five monkeys approach from the west.

3. You must love Bogfubflam.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Do not drink alcohol.