Yarthab is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, merciful lizard.

Yarthab created the Small Magellanic Cloud four million years ago.

If you believe in Yarthab, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Yarthab, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Yarthab's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Yarthab's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never feed bananas to nematodes while wearing shoes.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Erect a giant yellow sculpture of Yarthab in the centre of the settlement.

5. Never go into white rooms.