Libarpyarp is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, overgenerous dog.

Libarpyarp created the cosmos seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Libarpyarp, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Libarpyarp, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Libarpyarp's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Libarpyarp's Holy Commandments

1. Libarpyarp loves whales, so they must be respected.

2. Rats are not to be trusted.

3. Never hurt capybaras.

4. Worship no other gods but Libarpyarp.

5. Never think about gravity.