Sugtabjab is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, witless goblin.

Sugtabjab created silver five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sugtabjab, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Sugtabjab, she will remove you from existence.

Sugtabjab's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Sugtabjab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. You must never eat turnips.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Sugtabjab.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.