Japcibbumtetti is a god.
She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, quiet
gorilla.
Japcibbumtetti created the planet Saturn six thousand years ago.
If you believe in
Japcibbumtetti, she will celebrate by creating some universes.
If you do not believe in
Japcibbumtetti, she will jump up and down on your head.
Japcibbumtetti's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.
Japcibbumtetti's Holy Commandments1. Do not listen to music.
2. Respect your elders.
3. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.
4. Always treat geese with great respect.
5. Erect seven gold sculptures of Japcibbumtetti on top of important buildings.