Ratflowcam is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, overgenerous crow.

Ratflowcam created an up quark five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ratflowcam, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Ratflowcam, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Ratflowcam's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Ratflowcam's Holy Commandments

1. Never chant in the presence of sheep.

2. Never feed turnips to tortoises while wearing skirts.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.