Gunbapjabpan is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, compassionate fish.

Gunbapjabpan created the universe five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gunbapjabpan, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Gunbapjabpan, he will turn you into a frog.

Gunbapjabpan's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Gunbapjabpan's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention voles.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Never feed lots of cherries to sharks while wearing orange dresses.

4. Never jump in holy places.

5. Never eat green fruit.