Bissdissquamyamcuttimyatsit is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, competent fairy.

Bissdissquamyamcuttimyatsit created the Milkyway four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bissdissquamyamcuttimyatsit, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Bissdissquamyamcuttimyatsit, she will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Bissdissquamyamcuttimyatsit's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Bissdissquamyamcuttimyatsit's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention pigs.

2. Erect a large tin sculpture of Bissdissquamyamcuttimyatsit on top of all buildings.

3. Do not take Bissdissquamyamcuttimyatsit's name in vain.

4. Do not eat bananas.

5. Never feed lots of pineapples to moths while wearing red shoes.