Sagspagmobafpangmatgamsan Genab is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, all-knowing clam.

Sagspagmobafpangmatgamsan Genab created Africa six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sagspagmobafpangmatgamsan Genab, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Sagspagmobafpangmatgamsan Genab, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Sagspagmobafpangmatgamsan Genab's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Sagspagmobafpangmatgamsan Genab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Worship no other gods but Sagspagmobafpangmatgamsan Genab.

4. Never talk about electromagnetism.

5. You must love Sagspagmobafpangmatgamsan Genab.