Bogyarjab is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, all-knowing bird.

Bogyarjab created a top quark five million years ago.

If you believe in Bogyarjab, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Bogyarjab, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Bogyarjab's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Bogyarjab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place in gray.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Always help mites.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.