Madcemquillgardonflat is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, ruthless grasshopper.

Madcemquillgardonflat created matter five billion years ago.

If you believe in Madcemquillgardonflat, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Madcemquillgardonflat, she will ignore you.

Madcemquillgardonflat's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Madcemquillgardonflat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill swans.

2. Foxes are not to be trusted.

3. Always make sure there are no cats in a building before entering it.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Do not cook food in pots.