Zedlitgom is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, resourceful hamster.

Zedlitgom created Africa six billion years ago.

If you believe in Zedlitgom, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Zedlitgom, she will ignore you and hope you go away.

Zedlitgom's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Zedlitgom's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant fawn sculpture of Zedlitgom in the centre of the settlement.

2. Hide if four pigs approach from the north.

3. Never paint your arms gray.

4. Zedlitgom loves grasshopers, so they must be respected.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.