Lamfengov Quamfetcip Sigteenstip is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, sapient pig.

Lamfengov Quamfetcip Sigteenstip created the Black Eye Galaxy three billion years ago.

If you believe in Lamfengov Quamfetcip Sigteenstip, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Lamfengov Quamfetcip Sigteenstip, it will turn you into a rat.

Lamfengov Quamfetcip Sigteenstip's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Lamfengov Quamfetcip Sigteenstip's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not shave your head.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Worship no other gods but Lamfengov Quamfetcip Sigteenstip.