Rownegtig is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, tranquil eagle.

Rownegtig created matter seven million years ago.

If you believe in Rownegtig, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Rownegtig, he will turn you into a giant slug.

Rownegtig's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Rownegtig's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from black dogs, for they are unholy.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Always treat birds with great respect.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Do not stand on grass.