Nanbosszog is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, duplicitous giraffe.

Nanbosszog created Africa four years ago.

If you believe in Nanbosszog, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Nanbosszog, it will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Nanbosszog's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Nanbosszog's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about archaea.

2. Nanbosszog loves ants, so they must be honoured.

3. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.

4. Never think ill of sick dolphins.

5. Never wear skirts.