Abzodsom is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, generous zebra.

Abzodsom created the cosmos three billion years ago.

If you believe in Abzodsom, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Abzodsom, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Abzodsom's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Abzodsom's Holy Commandments

1. Do not leap in public.

2. Never paint your legs brown.

3. Run away from pink tortoises, for they are unholy.

4. Put Abzodsom first in all things.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.