Sinfatbon Pogfobgun Zimstipril is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, contented deer.

Sinfatbon Pogfobgun Zimstipril created the universe nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sinfatbon Pogfobgun Zimstipril, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Sinfatbon Pogfobgun Zimstipril, she will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Sinfatbon Pogfobgun Zimstipril's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Sinfatbon Pogfobgun Zimstipril's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill snakes.

2. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near dolphins while wearing brown boots and balancing five lead spheres on your hands.

3. Never hurt seals.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.