Cemgomjop Labing is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, two-faced hedgehog.

Cemgomjop Labing created a photon two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cemgomjop Labing, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Cemgomjop Labing, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Cemgomjop Labing's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Cemgomjop Labing's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large silicon sculpture of Cemgomjop Labing on top of all buildings.

2. Never talk about electromagnetism near tapirs while wearing mauve scarves.

3. Always wear cyan.

4. Never wear coats.

5. Always obey Cemgomjop Labing's priests.