Bedpomdob is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, humorless human.

Bedpomdob created an atom three billion years ago.

If you believe in Bedpomdob, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Bedpomdob, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Bedpomdob's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Bedpomdob's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear scarves.

2. Hide if three tortoises approach from the east.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Do not eat aubergines.

5. Never hurt seals.