Hamgodciss is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, slow shark.

Hamgodciss created dark energy eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hamgodciss, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Hamgodciss, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Hamgodciss' most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Hamgodciss' Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Always make sure there are no horses in a building before entering it.

3. Never write about black holes.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Always take life seriously.