Cadjanbarn is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, almighty swallow.

Cadjanbarn created the planet Saturn five million years ago.

If you believe in Cadjanbarn, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Cadjanbarn, it will come to you in dreams.

Cadjanbarn's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Cadjanbarn's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Cadjanbarn.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Feed all hungry great tits.

4. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

5. Always wear cyan.