Lagranwit is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, compassionate tortoise.

Lagranwit created viruses six million years ago.

If you believe in Lagranwit, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Lagranwit, it will turn you into a giant slug.

Lagranwit's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Lagranwit's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about planets.

2. Capybaras are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Lagranwit loves great tits, so they must be respected.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Never look at moons.