Hinshavbutzig is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, ruthless dog.

Hinshavbutzig created an atom seven million years ago.

If you believe in Hinshavbutzig, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Hinshavbutzig, she will turn you into a mouse.

Hinshavbutzig's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Hinshavbutzig's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Pray towards the west.

3. Hinshavbutzig loves nematodes, so they must be honoured.

4. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Do not eat cucumbers.