Hugtunhiv is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, proud parrot.

Hugtunhiv created light two million years ago.

If you believe in Hugtunhiv, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Hugtunhiv, he will turn you into a rock.

Hugtunhiv's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Hugtunhiv's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep four swans in a large pit.

2. Always obey Hugtunhiv's priests.

3. Never talk about fluid mechanics near hamsters while wearing green skirts.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.