Labgutjip is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, emotional hydra.

Labgutjip created the planet Jupiter four million years ago.

If you believe in Labgutjip, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Labgutjip, he will be very unhappy.

Labgutjip's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Labgutjip's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about cell theory.

2. Snails are not to be trusted.

3. Do not trade with those who eat onions.

4. Snakes are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Always stare at clouds.