Bapnurtvid is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, conceited wyvern.

Bapnurtvid created Asia two billion years ago.

If you believe in Bapnurtvid, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Bapnurtvid, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Bapnurtvid's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Bapnurtvid's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Never skip near horses.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Snails are not to be trusted.

5. Never think about black holes.