Yogzenont is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, vain salamander.

Yogzenont created a top quark six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yogzenont, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Yogzenont, she will not invite you to parties.

Yogzenont's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Yogzenont's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Do not eat coconuts.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Yogzenont.

5. Always wear purple.