Jangesswon is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, unfair hyena.

Jangesswon created viruses seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jangesswon, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Jangesswon, she will not invite you to parties.

Jangesswon's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Jangesswon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Erect a giant blue sculpture of Jangesswon in the centre of the settlement.

3. Never feed lots of cucumbers to manatees while wearing indigo shoes.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Whales are unholy and should not be approached.