Cudfuttigwik is a god.

He takes the form of a large, caring wasp.

Cudfuttigwik created vertebrates four billion years ago.

If you believe in Cudfuttigwik, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Cudfuttigwik, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Cudfuttigwik's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Cudfuttigwik's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Cudfuttigwik seven times a day.

2. Always look after injured tapirs.

3. Erect four iron sculptures of Cudfuttigwik on top of important buildings.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.