Lunjatfun is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, all-powerful rhinoceros.

Lunjatfun created the world four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lunjatfun, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Lunjatfun, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Lunjatfun's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Lunjatfun's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if four birds approach from the south.

2. You must pray to Lunjatfun seven times a day.

3. You must never eat lemons.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.