Talyog is a god.

He takes the form of a large, annoying toad.

Talyog created the world three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Talyog, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Talyog, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Talyog's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Talyog's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick doves.

2. Never look at planets.

3. Feed all hungry geese.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.