Citcunyatt is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, passionate weasel.

Citcunyatt created everything that exists five million years ago.

If you believe in Citcunyatt, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Citcunyatt, it will boil you in a big pot.

Citcunyatt's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Citcunyatt's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate frogs.

4. Do not speak about cucumbers.

5. Never eat bark.