Bomtailfon is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, humane newt.

Bomtailfon created the Whirlpool Galaxy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bomtailfon, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Bomtailfon, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Bomtailfon's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Bomtailfon's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at asteroids.

2. Do not kill porpoises.

3. Run away from magenta seals, for they are unholy.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate grasshopers.

5. Do not trade with those who eat strawberries.