Witniggess is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, deceitful toad.

Witniggess created the planet Venus five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Witniggess, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Witniggess, he will be very unhappy.

Witniggess' most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Witniggess' Holy Commandments

1. Never mention dolphins.

2. Put Witniggess first in all things.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate hamsters.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Do not shave your arms.