Vinnakstaf is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, proud capybara.

Vinnakstaf created snails eight million years ago.

If you believe in Vinnakstaf, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Vinnakstaf, it will boil you in a big pot.

Vinnakstaf's most sacred site is Gomba in Hungary.

Vinnakstaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never run in holy places.

2. Never go into brown rooms.

3. Always treat dolphins with great respect.

4. Never talk about turtles.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.