Badtundod is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, irritating grasshopper.

Badtundod created a strange quark nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Badtundod, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Badtundod, she will make you grow a tail.

Badtundod's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Badtundod's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the south.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Never think about dark matter near otters while wearing mauve corsets and balancing seven lead spheres on your back.

5. Always make sure there are no mice in a building before entering it.