Jadbamdibomin is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, awesome mink.

Jadbamdibomin created the planet Saturn four billion years ago.

If you believe in Jadbamdibomin, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Jadbamdibomin, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Jadbamdibomin's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Jadbamdibomin's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat figs.

2. Do not eat corn.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate doves.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Never talk about seals.