Bessqueegyattquaf is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, sage pigeon.

Bessqueegyattquaf created humankind seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bessqueegyattquaf, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Bessqueegyattquaf, it will turn you into a snail.

Bessqueegyattquaf's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Bessqueegyattquaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of limes to moths while wearing white rings.

2. Do not keep four snails in a large pit.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Bessqueegyattquaf loves badgers, so they must be honoured.

5. Do not kill grasshopers.