Gilwip is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, vain lobster.

Gilwip created matter seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gilwip, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Gilwip, it will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Gilwip's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Gilwip's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if eight porpoises approach from the south.

2. Do not wear zinc on your body.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Do not drink water in magenta rooms.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of iron.