Canlimhimdissbuszakbut is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, narcissistic fish.

Canlimhimdissbuszakbut created an up quark eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Canlimhimdissbuszakbut, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Canlimhimdissbuszakbut, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Canlimhimdissbuszakbut's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Canlimhimdissbuszakbut's Holy Commandments

1. Canlimhimdissbuszakbut loves swans, so they must be respected.

2. Never laugh in holy places.

3. Never think about archaea.

4. Do not wear blue clothing.

5. Run away if six grasshopers approach from the south.