Hanquilltik is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, unjust dugong.

Hanquilltik created the Black Eye Galaxy six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hanquilltik, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Hanquilltik, she will laugh at you.

Hanquilltik's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Hanquilltik's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no otters in a room before entering it.

2. Never think about galaxies.

3. Erect a large copper sculpture of Hanquilltik on top of all buildings.

4. Pray towards the south.

5. Always wear black.