Tancatbin is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, dishonourable eagle.

Tancatbin created the universe four years ago.

If you believe in Tancatbin, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Tancatbin, he will turn you into a snail.

Tancatbin's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Tancatbin's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Tancatbin.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of gold.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Never wear dresses.