Yamtargcim is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, emotional dugong.

Yamtargcim created snails eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yamtargcim, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Yamtargcim, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Yamtargcim's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Yamtargcim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat grapes.

2. Yamtargcim must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Never wear indigo tights.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Never hurt capybaras.