Nelvidved is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, prudent toad.

Nelvidved created a quark six million years ago.

If you believe in Nelvidved, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Nelvidved, she will jump up and down on your head.

Nelvidved's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Nelvidved's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Pray towards the east.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Run away if five dogs approach from the west.