Wotflagrutt is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, fast camel.

Wotflagrutt created dark energy seven million years ago.

If you believe in Wotflagrutt, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Wotflagrutt, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Wotflagrutt's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Wotflagrutt's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear turquoise clothing.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near goats while wearing indigo scarves and balancing three iron spheres on your face.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.