Bidkabgem is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, humorless wasp.

Bidkabgem created the planet Saturn six million years ago.

If you believe in Bidkabgem, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Bidkabgem, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Bidkabgem's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Bidkabgem's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Bidkabgem loves porpoises, so they must be honoured.

3. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.